Well, this has been worthless so far. For eight years I wanted to get back home, and now that I'm here I'm still waiting for the Twins to win a single regular season game. They're still at home, so I guess that's cool, although they face Carlos Rodon, who Fangraphs and B-R and everyone seems to agree is about to break out in a big way (he struck out a ton in the minors).
Phil Hughes goes for the Twins, and will probably throw two or three balls and ninety strikes. I keep sitting here trying to come up with new ways to beg for a win, but I'll just try to bow out gracefully and whisper that I would, indeed, like one. Let's do this, Twins.
I kind of like the red uniforms *prepares myself to be pelted with tomatos*
I dig the red unis, just not the red cap of death.
According to the guy down the row from me, it's all Mauer's fault
Ask him if there's any sort of presence missing in the locker room.
He's right. It's hard to care when your wallet is weighing you down.
I hate these uniforms so that means they have to become some sort of good luck symbol.
This ump has quite a variable strike zone.
Phil Hughes works out of a jam. That was nice.
OMG. I didn't expect that outcome.
I wanna say that was some mighty fine wiggling, but I don't think it counts when you strike a couple guys out.
A walk is the same as a single, amiright?!?
ugh, the fucking bunt. I know that the old school is a school, but I fucking hate the bunt. And I hate the "a drive to deep right field" call dick.
Sweet, home just in time for the salute to America.
...oh. My DVR took me to the beginning of the game instead of live. Carry on.
Stupid technology.
blarf. I blame mauer for that out.
insurmountable
Sigh
More than zero runs will be required to win this game. I was kind of hoping for a shootout at the end.
welp, gave up a run. game over.
Hawk's getting whiny about the the strikezone.
Whew, I was worried the sun might not come up tomorrow.
sac bunt 😥
Sadly, it might be the better choice with Rosario batting against a lefty.
Especially against Rodon, who has huge splits for his career.
Great time for Kepler's first home run.
Or his first sac fly.
Is there a German word for hitting a grand slam after they intentionally walk the bases loaded for you?
Apparently not.
There is, actually: ausgezeichnet
Gesundheit.
Looked very much like a rookie at-bat. Park could've at least got a right-handed bat in there.
Guys, salami starts with the same letter as Suzuki.
salami is awesome. Suzuki, well, not as awesome as salami.
So does shit.
Suzuki was determined to pop up.
So, I'm going to go upstairs and watch netflix and mentally prepare to have my knee sliced open tomorrow. I'll see y'all on the flip side.
"have my knee sliced open tomorrow"
Metaphor, eh?
Nope. Actually going to have surgery tomorrow.
Best wishes, meat.
Good luck. I'm sure getting the stabbing fragment out of there will be great in the long run.
You mean like a marathon?
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOO OOOO OOO OO OO O O O O O O O O O O
And that'll do it. I feel sorry for the starting pitching. I never imagined I'd say that at the beginning of this season.
I remain optimistic that the Twins will win at least one game this year.
Scouting report from Target Field: they really really suck
Say it with me now:
Hot
Garbage
Gold Star for this man.
woof
Must suck to be the Braves then. They're also 0-8 but they can't blame no-hitting themselves on the futility.
They're 18th. Their pitchers are 3rd highest in average, 2nd in OBP, and sixth in SLG.
At least we can look forward to regressing to the mean. Or would that be progressing to the mean?
That's bad, of course, but it's really just a symptom of poor hitting generally. When you only get six or seven hits a game (or, as last night, four), it's not likely that very many are going to come with runners in scoring position.
Well, movie was 2½ hours long, but apparently even that wasn't long enough.