186 thoughts on “2014 HR Derby”

  1. Chris Berman off to a rousing start. He is not going to "bore you" explaining the new HR Derby format

    1. I loved that. Also, Berman & Kruk seemed puzzled as to why there was only one lefty in the field.

  2. What's the over/under on minutes until Berman makes us put our TVs on mute?

  4. GoGo towels down Puig.

    Puig interview translation: "baseball...been berry berry good...to me."

  5. I love that Puig underscored the boost that Dodgers fans are giving the team by staying until the end of the games.

  10. Interviewer to Cap'n Dreamboat:

    "Okay, I'm going to ask you to get a little reflective. 'Yankee Captain Derek Jeter.' What comes to your mind?"

    1. The panel is pointing out how he "doesn't relish the spotlight." Like hell. If he didn't relish the spotlight he wouldn't announce his retirement before the season so he could have all their opposition fellate him all year.

      1. Having your own cologne line named after you is a sign of true humility, too.

      2. The same people that believe that load believe that Torii hates being remembered for catching the Bonds shot in the ASG.

  14. Oh lord, these rules are stupid. How about 12 points for every homer over 475 feet, 10 for every homer over 450', 8 for every homer over 400', 6 for every homer over 375', 4 for every homer over 350' and 2 for a homer shorter than 350'? 10 outs per round, 3 rounds total.

  20. Didn't make the Eastern/Central time conversion, still turned on the TV just in time for Dozier's round. Okay, muted, and back to Foyle's War DVD.

    1. I was wondering if Morneau would; forgot about Tulo. Just don't tell Selig about the fraternizing.

    1. The obvious and most likely recognizable pick, St. Paul, would have worked. Pretty sure.

          1. I'm forever spoiled by Herb. Herb would have researched his geography if he was going to use it in a call.

            1. I assumed he actually knew directions. I assumed he did at least that research before his one highlight game-calling opportunity each year.
              I'm disillusioned.

    3. Gentlemen, you can't expect Chris to know where any of these places are...he was obviously too busy honing his, "Back-back-backbackback" call.

      1. I hope so. He would hit 75 home runs.
        Than again, he would not be facing Twins pitching.

  29. I am intrigued to see what Stanton can do. I like the choice of participants this year.

  31. The mrs: "that's what determines home field advantage in the world series? That's the dumbest thing in the world!"

    Me: selig shrug.

    1. Meh. Home field advantage in the World Series isn't that important, so it may as well be decided by something dumb.

      Though yes, I realize I cheer for a team that has seen 21 World Series games, 20 of which were won by the home team.

    1. The original format of the early 60s show was pretty good. Head to head, broadcaster talked to the guy not hitting.

      1. That would be pretty good, have the guy that just hit do the commentary for the next guy. That, or just mic up the players watching.

    1. I feel bad for him. All of his family is probably back in Cuba and he didn't have anyone to pitch for him until the last minute. The Dodgers should've taken care of that.

  36. Please have the recipient of the Michael Weiner Scholarship for Labor Studies come to Madison to study under the Selig Chair of Sports History.

    1. Eh? Don't the top three ALers go? He's on the brink, but not out.

      Granted, the only time I could have learned about the rules, Berman deemed them too boring to relate to me.

  38. The kids seem to be catching everything. This is a strange experience to the roaming bands of young'uns of past Derbies.

    1. As fun as it is to watch brothers and fathers pitching, there's something to having someone pitch to you that has a practiced throwing motion.

      2. I remember when Mauer was in it and didn't really have a chance because of his choice of a BP pitcher.

  52. Oh to have Stanton vs Thome vs Killebrew vs Gibson vs Ruth in their primes.

    1. Why waste all that effort? Cut the rope that moors him to the Earth and the hot air will carry him there.

      1. I honestly can't see how he thought it would work. Normally I can tell where his idiotic ideas come from, but this one displayed a total lack of effort.

  56. Seriously, though, it is absolutely horrifying to be that Chris Berman makes as much money as he does. "Is it a bringer of gone? " Really? This is a professional talker?

  65. Who's the asshole with Berman? His comment about the kids tracking the ball may have been a joke, but what in the hell?

      1. I don't think you could possibly find a pairing of two guys worse at their jobs than these yahoos.

        2. I find Kruk tolerable during Sunday Night games, but he seems disinterested in this.

          2. Disinterested is one thing, but man, ragging on kids on a national televised event should really get him the axe.

  68. Ok, I just noticed this: the guys throwing BP (brothers, managers, BP catchers) all get All-Star jerseys as participants, but Morneau had to wear his Rockies BP jersey because he's not an All-Star this season.

    3. Morneau had to be talked into the HR derby after not being an All-Star. He may very well have turned down the jersey knowing he's not an All-Star.

  70. Well, I tuned in in time to see Morneau hit a couple bombs. Now I'm waiting for Stanton's second round.

  72. "I dont know what this means, so you can Sabermatric this one" - Chris Berman, professional broadcaster

  73. Did Berman really just say "Feets don't fail me now!"?! Does he know where that comes from?

    1. You guys don't have to watch with the TV sound on you know. I'm jamming to some wild english psychedelia while watching.

      1. I'm in Boston tonight, so I'm using the excuse that it's an hour later, so I'm tired and unable to grab the remote.

          2. Eh, I like it. It's fun to watch some of the best sluggers air it out a bit.

            Bergman and Krum can't steal that joy...not quite.

            1. This. I keep the volume low to easily tune out Berman, et al. and focus on the crowd noise. I am usually not paying complete attention so listening for the crowd helps.

  74. "Mankato-bound!"

    Fer chrisssakes, dude. If you're gonna look up some Minnesota towns for your calls, look at a map while you're at it.

    People on the coasts are going to wonder why he hasn't called one headed to Lake Wobegon yet.

    1. It's about Todd Frazier attempting to ruin my evening, because I don't feel like having the winner be the only guy I'd never heard of before this Derby.

          2. I love watching Cespedes Blast home runs. Last year was a lot of fun.

            I guess I just don't want two home runs to win the derby.

        2. I'm rooting for Jose Canseco to make a surprise appearance because I missed him when he was in madison a couple weeks ago.

      2. That's my biggest problem with Berman, really. He wasn't always terrible. It's just that he hasn't updated his act in thirty years. He's like a stand-up comic who's still telling Reagan jokes because, hey, they were funny in the '80s, so they should still be funny now.

  81. Cespedes should be an automatic entrant in every HR Derby until he doesn't want to be anymore. This is utterly absurd.

  83. Only two celebrities I have ever heard of in this softball game Andrew Zimmern and January Jones.

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