If I'm just making the coffee at 8:30, clearly plenty of citizens must have President's Day off.
All posts by Philosofer
January 11, 2015: Church Basement Coffee
I really could have used one of those "donuts and coffee in the basement this morning" Sundays. It was not to be.
Father Knows Best – Hard Conversations
It's been a hell of a year. My wife's grandfather, my cousin's baby, and my sister all passed away. My mother-in-law has cancer (treatable, sounds like it'll be OK, but a couple scary weeks). I left my job. Oh, and we added a third child in May. Sorry for bringing all that up again... sometimes I feel like it's all I talk about.
I'm sure my kids wonder sometimes too. They've been exposed to some big things this year, and they ask some good questions. We've had to have a number of hard conversations with our kids - especially our 5 year old - about they way the world is, why things happen like they do, etc. We've tried not to shy away from the tough answers, but always try to keep a focus on the positive. I know sometimes we slip and give more trite responses, but usually we've done pretty well explaining birth (well, not so much the causes thereof...), death, employment stress, joblessness, etc. And they seem to have done a pretty good job with their processing of the information.
Through each of these moments, sharing the reality of the situation with my kids has helped me too. One of the things that made me feel best about losing my job was when I explained to my son that I had been unhappy working there, and so leaving it was a good thing. I let him know there might be some changes and stress around home, or that we might have to move when I find something (or, I suppose, if I don't find something) but that I would find a new job and we'd all be happier for it. He thought it sounded good, and came up with some of his own positives, like now I could spend more time helping him color.
When my sister died, he was at the hospital. He asked if he could go see her body, and we let him. There were a lot of questions for a few weeks, about life, death, and the afterlife. We're a family of faith, so we talked to him about heaven, letting him know that we don't really have any specific knowledge about it, but that we have faith God takes care of us. Every once in a while there's a new question that pops up - the other day it was about whether animals go to heaven - and so we can tell they're still processing all this information. Heck, I suppose I still am too.
I've wondered at times if I'm doing the right thing by having these conversations with my kids. My parents didn't peel back the curtain on adulthood nearly as early as we are. At the same time, I'm still trying to shield my kids from some of the more trying items, and focus on positive aspects. My hope is that my willingness to talk about big things with them - no matter how young they are - will help them be open with me too.
How about it, citizens? What's your approach to tough conversations with your kids? How did it change as they got older? I'm still stuck with pre-school kids, so I'd imagine school adds all sorts of wrinkles. How much is too much when they're so young? Where have I already gone wrong?
Also, I've been wanting to have these posts feature music that is played for kids. So here's one my favorites for my kids, and when it's your turn, you should share one too!
httpv://youtu.be/4EiU9pTweyw
On The Simpsons
FXX is currently running an Every Simpsons Ever Marathon, and I've been tuning in a lot. I watched an absurd amount of The Simpsons in college and law school, and even after that. Right about up until I had kids. In some ways, it's weird to think that they've continued on for the past 5 years, without me. I'm kind of looking forward to seeing some of the newer episodes during this marathon.
I thought it would be worth having a conversation on the WGOM about The Simpsons. For a long time I was of the mindset that The Simpsons stopped being good right about Season 9. But last night I saw a number of episodes from Season 10, and I realized there were some really good ones still. Not all of them. And there were some real clunkers ("Maximum Homerdrive" ::shudder::). But two of them even makes my top 10 favorites list. (Which I'll present here, and maybe try to kick off a conversation). It might well be time for me to re-evaluate my earlier take on The Simpsons.
Though I remain disappointed in the movie. I mean, in a Simpsons movie the bad guy has to be Mr. Burns, right? How did they manage to mess up such a natural mandate? Sigh. Anyway, here's my favorites. Lots of good ones I had to leave off the list.
Phil's 10 Phavorite Simpsons Episodes:
Das Bus (#5F11 / SI-911)
Team Homer (#3F10)
Homer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment (#4F15)
22 Short Films About Springfield (#3F18)
Simpson Tide (#3G04)
You Only Move Twice (#3F23)
Bart Sells His Soul (#3F02)
Mom and Pop Art (#AABF15)
The Old Man and the "C" Student (#AABF16)
Homer the Great (#2F09)
Bucket List Book
Gravity's Rainbow was a "Bucket List Book" for me. We've all got "To Read" lists that are far too long, but even on those lists some of the books stand out. I've always been pretty good about working my way through them (I've loved the challenge ever since I took a Great Books class in college), but somehow even among the Bucket List Books, Gravity's Rainbow stood out. Maybe because I adore Pynchon, and this is considered his masterpiece. Maybe because it's notoriously difficult. Whatever the case, it was one of the biggies on my Book Reading Bucket List. And now, I'm glad I've read it. Even if I never really get it all.
I started Gravity's Rainbow in December. I finally finished Sunday night. 8 months it took me. Part of that was a function of some insanity in my life, but that added a couple months at most. Mostly it was that there were many days when I didn't pick it up at all, or when I did I would only read a page or two. I've had this experience with Pynchon before - when I read Against The Day - and like in that instance, finishing the book didn't necessarily leave me with an immediate sense of accomplishment. But I hope that experience proves instructive in a more important way.
When I read Against The Day I frequently felt lost as I read through it. Pynchon's prose can be extremely difficult. He gets lost in asides and transitions, and asides and transitions become the main story, main characters fade entirely from the story, minor characters jump back into essential roles, etc. I read ATD alone, and it was probably the biggest reading challenge I've ever faced. When I was done, I wasn't sure what I'd just finished. But as time passed, more and more things started to click. I feel like I really "get" ATD now. I don't feel that way about Gravity's Rainbow, but maybe in a few months I will. It's also worth saying that, having read both Against The Day and Gravity's Rainbow, that, right now at least, I feel like Against The Day is the better of the two. Gravity's Rainbow was Pynchon's first masterpiece, perhaps, but not his greatest. Maybe I'll feel differently, eventually, when I've had some time to sit with GR.
As for the content itself... My initial thoughts probably aren't worth much. I'm stunned. The ending was anti-climactic. My favorite character was a fairly minor person, I suppose. The protagonist, and indeed, the book, seemed to lack direction. A lot of that was on purpose, but it didn't change the maddening nature of the fact. I want to hear what others have to say about it. I want to sit down and talk about it. I feel like there's so much to be unpacked. It's a rare thing to read a book so dense, that so begs for conversation. I've got several dozen pages dog-eared to comment on. If others are willing, I'd be happy to jot down more specific thoughts in the comments.
For now, let me just say: I'm done. It is good to be done. It is a very good thing to be done with a Bucket List book.
So, how about it citizens? What have you been reading? What are your Bucket List books? Who wants to actually talk about Gravity's Rainbow? Pepper and DG (and others), are you ready for Pale Fire?
WGOM H-BH Supplemental: On Banned Players
In 1877 there were basically 2 good team: Boston and Louisville. Starting in August, Louisville went on an 8 game losing streak, and finished the season 7 games behind Boston. Louisville's team president, Charles Chase, investigated his own team, and 4 players - including Jim Devlin - confessed to taking bribes to throw the games. Chase took the step of suspending his players, and the League made permanent their suspensions at the winter meetings.
1877 was the second year of the National League. From its very first, Major League Baseball has had lifelong bans for players involved in gambling or throwing games. Whether a sign was posted in the locker room or not, this has always been the way. Look back 2 years earlier, and you can see some of the reasons why.
Father Knows Best: Snowflakes
About a month ago Aquinas, who is 4 (and a boy) had a preschool Christmas pageant. I may have told the story before, but bear with me. After the first song, one of the little girls waved and shouted "Hi, Mom!" The audience laughed. And you could see the light-bulb go on over Aquinas' head. From that point on, in each of the lulls between songs, he would do something "silly" like shout nonsense words, wave his arms wildly, or even flipping his bottom lip with his hands (a bit unsanitary...). We were a embarrassed. "Wouldn't want to be that kid's parents," we said.
Continue reading Father Knows Best: Snowflakes
January 14, 2014: Grumble, Winter, Grumble
I don't like winter. I like it even less when there's no coffee in the morning.
Haim – The Wire
httpv://youtu.be/TLTQjhW55jA
I debated between 3 videos for this, but ultimately this one won out. Because gurl singers (for Pepper). Also, I couldn't find a version of The Preature's "Is This How You Feel" that I liked (seems for them, live <<< produced?)
I'm throwing a bonus video your way too:
Continue reading Haim – The Wire
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Loading... Philosofickle Thoughts
I think we've likely discussed this before, but, if you'll indulge me, I've had some thoughts lately:
I have two siblings with Cystic Fibrosis. My sister is 23, and my brother will be turning 16 this week. For my brother's birthday he will be attending a luau. In Hawaii. See... about a year ago he applied to the Make-A-Wish Foundation. His wish was to go to Hawaii. His wish was granted.
In addition to my brother, my parents and all of my siblings who still lived at home when the application was made (4, excluding by brother) were flown to Hawaii over the weekend. So... 7 people. They'll be getting a full week, all expenses paid. They appear from the pictures to be staying in a penthouse suite of the Sheraton Waikiki. They will have snorkeling and surfing excursions, and tours of all sorts of cool cultural stuff (Pearl Harbor is closed because of the shutdown, of course...). All their meals are paid for. They even got spending cash.
It's a funny thing, seeing such generosity (indeed, I'd consider myself an indirect recipient). Truly humbling. I am a blessed person. We are all blessed people. Even my siblings with CF. It's easy, of course, for me to talk on their behalf. I'm not the one who has to deal with disease every day. But it reminds me of a speech my sister (a different one) gave:
I also have a nephew who was born with hypoplastic-left heart syndrome. In short, he only has half a heart. As you'd imagine, this causes all sorts of problems, and he has many, many other complications. When he was born, there was a large community fundraiser to help cover all the medical bills. At that event, my sister got up to thank everyone for their generosity. She said something to the effect of "I want to thank everyone for all their support. We are truly blessed. And I mean that. When people find out about our son's condition, they tells us all the time 'I'm so sorry.' Well, I'm not. Because my son is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me."
I can still hear her saying it. I've got tears in my eyes as I type this. I'm not entirely sure why I'm putting this post up. Maybe if the priest hadn't touched on our need to be humble in yesterday's homily, none of this would have struck me. But I forget, far too often, that nothing I have is my own. I have been given health, and family, and friends, and intellect, and humor, and a sister (another one) who's a dentist to fix my teeth, and everything else. I am blessed.
Seeing pictures of my family's trip to Hawaii, my heart is filled. Being the recipient of generosity is humbling, and it makes me want to be a better person. I want to be more generous. I am blessed.