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Parentgood

Father Knows Best – overwhelmed

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Sometimes I wonder if we made the right decision

Two weeks ago, we accepted a foster placement of an almost 2-year old girl I'll call Dakota.  We thought it would be a good fit.  She was just a year older than our youngest.  Our other kids have demonstrated friendliness and acceptance to a couple of other foster children we've accepted in our home.  I would say that we've had good experiences with previous foster children in our home (granted, they were for very short amounts of time)

Just before Dakota came to live with us, we worried about whether or not this placement would actually happen.  A part of us was worried that something would prevent us from having an opportunity to care for this girl.  We were very excited at the possibility though.

A lot has changed in just a month.

Dakota is a very high energy child.  This means that she's constantly on the go, and eats and poops A LOT.  Her curiosity gets her many places that she shouldn't be, and I feel like we're constantly correcting and redirecting her.  All the while trying to remember her past and why she came to be placed into care in the first place, realizing that you need to have a different approach to children from foster care than you do your own children.

It has been incredibly difficult, and it's taking a toll on my wife and I.  My wife has been bearing the brunt of the work, spending most of the day with her, trying to homeschool our other children in the meantime.  Luckily the older children are somewhat independent and able to do much of their work on their own.  By the time evening comes along, I try to be intentional about helping out by taking more direct responsibility for Dakota and let my wife have some time to herself.

Dakota does not like bedtime, and would much rather play and run around in her room.  Once she finally does go down, we try to get as much sleep as we can, taking the same approach that many take to caring for newborns - sleep while she sleeps.

I believe it has less to do with her being a foster child, and more to do with the fact that she's nearly 2.  I'm hopeful that we can move past this and come to a new normal with her in our home.  However, our sanity seems to be taking a hit.

We're going to a family camp this weekend that we scheduled months ago.  I'm not sure how it's going to go, as both my wife and I are very concerned how Dakota's presence is going to affect the family dynamic.  If you pray, please pray for our family and for Dakota.  If you don't, well, keep us in your thoughts anyway.

How have you been feeling overwhelmed lately?

 

At The Movies

Third Monday Movie Day: I’m A Revenger!

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I accomplished the rare feat of going to a theater to see a movie this weekend. We picked Avengers: Age of Ultron or whatever the subheading/punctuation combo is. I had seen a handful of reviews and "what does this mean for Captain America" etc. stories, and was kind of braced for the worst. I had largely avoided spoilers, so that was nice, but I was still ready to see something worse than the first one.

That was not my assessment. I really enjoyed it. Much more so than the first Avengers movie. Good action, good balance between characters, a really fun villain, a little bit of heart, a good amount of humor... a great popcorn flick.

So... what has everyone else seen this month? Tell me more about why I should go see Mad Max, since I'm hearing lots about that? Etc.

First Monday Book Day

First Monday Book Day: Silkpunk

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One of the things that I enjoy about following a lot of the science fiction and fantasy awards is that you get to read great short stories by authors that are getting their first exposure, before they publish a novel.  That's how I was introduced to Ken Liu, through his short story "The Paper Menagerie" which was really good.  Since then, Liu has been really prolific in the short fiction realm, consistently writing really good stories (a collection of his short fiction is coming out later this year, and I'll probably buy it, even though I've read most of its contents already).

All of this is to say that I was very excited to read his debut novel "The Grace of Kings".  It's a fantasy epic that has some steampunk tendencies and a pretty clear basis in Chinese/Asian folklore.  This combination has spawned the term "silkpunk" which Liu has talked about here and there (this podcast was a really interesting - and spoiler free - look at the book and the author's approach and viewpoint on fantasy).

I loved the book.  It wasn't standard fantasy based around a hero's journey, but jumped right in with a large cast and pulled everything together.  It read like the recounting of a legend where various stories were all cast and recast with the same set of characters.  It really played to my enjoyment of his short stories, but at the same time it was cohesive.  It's long (around 700-800 pages), but it felt like it earned that length - the scope is enormous.

It's the first book in a trilogy, but I think it stands perfectly well on its own.  All in all, one of my favorites that I've read this year.

Some short things I read last month:

  • Reading "Labyrinth" by Amelia Gray and then reading this short piece about the editing process for the story was pretty interesting.  Some of the things seem petty and weird, but I find the thought process of an author revising a story that's "finished" really interesting.

 

  • Grunion Run by Juliet Escoria.  This was my favorite story from her collection, Black Cloud. I read the entire collecion this month in about two sittings.  It was good, all the stories were about this short and they all tackled influences (positive and negative) and things that pull at you long after you think you've moved past them.  Every story in the collection has a companion video.  Here's the one for Grunion Run, and it's weird (and maybe NSFW - language).

 

  • Ciaran Berry - For the Birds.  I'm not quite finished with Berry's collection, but this poem is one of the many so far that has caught me up in the mix of rustic image and historic allusion.  Here's the author reading the poem:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ul8Zb2LCJQY

Games

The Games We Play

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To be honest, I didn't like the name "Getting Dicey."  Going with this much simpler, to-the-point title this time.

So, I have not played many games this last month.  Weird.  It's like I had something else occupying all my time.  Not sure what that was, but it may be the subject of my Father Knows Best coming next month.

Anyway, I wanted to share a little bit about Gaming Conventions.  Last year I went to my first gaming convention: Geekway To The West in St. Louis, MO.  IT. WAS. AWESOME!!!

I've been getting heavy into board gaming over the last 2-3 years, ever since my friends introduced me to games like Ticket To Ride, Shadows Over Camelot and Talisman.  When they told me about Geekway last year, I thought it sounded like a lot of fun.  It was.  I played so many new games like Euphoria (Build a Better Dystopia), Coal Baron (great worker placement game), Firefly (based on the TV show - shiny!), and also got to play a 60 player game of Werewolf.

This year, I'm going again, but I it's different for a number of reasons.  First, I know what to expect.  Last year, I really didn't know how to get into games when I didn't know anyone around.  This year, I not only know how to use the Meeple "Players Wanted" signs, but I also know a bunch more people going.  Also, after listening to several episodes of The Dice Tower over the last year, I'm aware of many of the latest games to get a lot of buzz.  Games like Mysterium, Dead of Winter, and XCOM the Board Game.

My favorite part of the convention is the Play and Win.  There are about 50 games (3 copies of each) that you can play throughout the weekend, when you do, you put your name into a drawing to win a copy of that game.  Last year I won a copy of Tzolkin: The Mayan Calendar and its expansion.  I already had the base game, so I sold the base for cash and bought Terra Mystica instead.  Oh... and you get a free game just for registering.  Last year I got a roll-and-move game called Bakong that I thought was mediocre, but my son sure liked it.  They did have some gems last year, and this year I'm hoping to get King of Tokyo of Sons of Anarchy.

If you love Board Games, Conventions are a great way to try a bunch of new stuff out, or get to those long drawn out games that you have a hard time getting to the table.  Conventions are becoming more and more popular.  To find one near you, I suggest looking here, or try Board Game Geek.

What have you been playing lately?

WGOM Fitness

Nothing new on race day

This last Sunday I did the Cheshire Half Marathon.  Great temps (43F at the start).   Flat course.  Trained for it well.

Several weeks back I bought some hiking boots/socks, and have been doing some trail hikes to break them in.  The hiking socks are some kind of smart wool, and are pretty close to the same color as my running socks (which are not as thick).

So I accidentally picked out the hiking socks on Sunday morning, and didn't even think about them, until mile 11, where I was struggling to run.   I finished, but wasn't happy with my time.

When I got home I found that the hiking socks had crowded the small toes in my running shoes, and I had developed large blisters on the outside toes.  Natch.

First Monday Book Day

How Not to Read a Book

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In bullet points:

  • notice Redeployment by Phil Klay has won the National Book Award and decide it’s really something you should read even though you tell yourself you’re not someone who likes books about war
  • request it from library only to have it ready for pickup months later when you’re already in the middle of another book
  • not to mention it's the busiest time of the year at work and you’re trying to do at least a little work most evenings
  • don’t start reading until the day before it’s due
  • find out that this is one of those books that grabs you by the throat and doesn’t let go
  • keep reading
  • receive overdue notice from the library
  • check library website; see that there are 57 copies and 31 requests, so if you returned it you could probably get it again pretty soon
  • fear loss of momentum; keep reading
  • find this Q&A and become even more obsessed with finishing the book
  • pull out the book while standing on a crowded bus (because this is your only chance to read all day); a guy notices you, stands up, and gestures for you to take his seat; wonder if he is a vet
  • feel grateful because it really is much easier to read while not trying to avoid falling over every time the bus makes a turn; finish a story about a guy who really wants to find a whore; wonder if the guy would have still given you his seat if he knew it was for that

So what are you reading?

Games

Getting Dicey

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This post is taking the place of Pixel Perfect Memories.  Because I want to incorporate board games into this feature, I want to come up with a better name.  So far, "Getting Dicey" is all I got.  If anyone has a suggestion, please share.

I plan on using this feature to share about new board games I've played and heard of, and to speak about the board game hobby in general.  Video games are still welcome, though I will probably not share much in that department

There's a gaming group that gets together here in Bloomington Normal every Wednesday.  I'm lucky to get there about once a month (because I'm busy with kid's activities).  This Wednesday, kids' activities were cancelled, so I took advantage.

First game was played was Russian Railroads.  Despite the name, this is nothing like Ticket to Ride or Railways of the World or other such train type games.  It's a medium-heavy Euro worker-placement game.  You start with 5-6 workers and place them on areas of the main board in order to advance your own board, which represents your personal railways.  You have three rails you are trying to develop, along with an industry track.  Each one can produce points in different ways, and it's up to you to maximize the value among the tracks.  It's somewhat difficult to explain, and the themeing is not intuitive, but I love this game.  I've been playing this for a while online, and I really want to get the home version, but unfortunately I don't see myself getting this to the table very often.

Second game we played was Betrayal at House on the Hill.  In this game, you're a character in a B-type horror movie, checking out an old abandoned house... on a hill.  The twist is that halfway through the game, the "haunt" is revealed, and one of your characters turns into the villain.  From then on, it's the traitor vs. the rest of the players in a battle of good vs. supernatural evil.  The game has several different scenarios, which gives it great replayability.

Finally, we played Formula De which has since been redone as Formula D.  In this game, you play a race car driver, pretty simple.  It's a fairly straight forward roll-and-move game, but each turn, you have the choice to shift up or down, which changes what die you roll, and with it, how far you can go.  There are turns which you'll have to stop with one of your die rolls, or suffer consequences.  We played a much simpler rule set, and I would like to play it again with the real rules.

Next time, I'm going to preview my trip to Geekway to the West in St. Louis May 14-17.

What have you been playing?

The Nation Has An Appetite

Chocolate Chip Peanut Butter Pretzel Cookies

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I have just one problem with these cookies—I can’t stop eating them.

1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened (1 stick)
1/4 cup (2.375 oz.) natural peanut butter, room temperature
1/2 cup (4 oz.) brown sugar, packed
1/4 cup (1.75 oz.) granulated sugar
1 large egg
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 1/3 cups (5.625 oz.) all-purpose flour [OR 2.5 oz. white whole wheat and the remainder all-purpose]
1 teaspoon cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
generous 1/4 teaspoon salt [OR scant 1/2 teaspoon, depending on your preference]
1 generous cup mini pretzel twists
1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips

Using a stand mixer (or sturdy electric hand mixer and a large bowl), cream butter, peanut butter, brown sugar, and granulated sugar, beating on medium speed for approximately 3 minutes, until light and fluffy. Scrape down sides of bowl. Add egg and vanilla and beat for 1 minute.

Add flour, cornstarch, baking soda, and salt while mixer is off. Start beating on slowest speed and gradually increase to medium. Beat until just combined and no more flour is visible, about 1 minute.

Add pretzels and chocolate chips, beating on low speed until combined. (This step will crush the pretzels.)

Slap some plastic wrap over the mixing bowl (or transfer to a smaller container with a lid) and refrigerate at least 1 hour and up to 24 hours.

When your chosen interval of time has passed, preheat oven to 350°F. Line cookie sheets with parchment paper.

Use a cookie scoop, spoon, or your hands to form dough into 1.5-inch mounds. Place about 2 inches apart on parchment-lined cookie sheets.

ready to bake

Bake for 10-12 minutes, rotating sheets on top and bottom racks halfway through. When done, the tops of the cookies should be barely set. Not to worry—they’ll bake a bit more as they cool. The finished cookies will be fairly soft.

Let sit on cookie sheet for 5-10 minutes (these are too fragile to transfer just out of the oven), then transfer to a wire rack to cool completely.

Store in an airtight plastic container or ziplock bag for up to 1 week.

NOTES: If you’re using peanut butter with salt, I’d probably go with the lower amount of salt. I had only light brown sugar on hand, but I definitely want to try to these cookies with dark brown sugar—this one in particular. The recipe makes about 2 dozen cookies, but it can be easily doubled. Recipe adapted from here.