Category Archives: 2011 Twins Game Logs

Game #(insert game number here): (insert AAA joke here) vs. (insert detroit or large cat joke here)

("Man this team is bad" joke)

(half-hearted statistical analysis detailing just how bad things have gotten)

(oh, wait... we're batting against Verlander today? We're even more out of luck than usual.)

(Make 190-pitch complete game joke.)

(links to these two Gleeman tweets detailing how the Twins aren't very good at anything)

(threaten to volunteer to do house work with the wife instead of watching game, only to chicken out later because the work she's got planned sucks, and bad baseball is better than no baseball until the 8th inning when we've only got ONE FREAKING RUN AGAIN)

(Delmon Young joke)

(snarky condolences to anyone who watches the game)

I mean, if the Twins can phone it in, why can't I?

Game 128: O’s at Twins

Don't see a game log, so here you go. Randall Simon vs. Brian Duensing.

ORIOLES (48-77)

1. J.J. Hardy, SS
2. Nick Markakis, RF
3. Adam Jones, CF
4. Vladimir Guerrero, DH
5. Matt Wieters, C
6. Mark Reynolds, 1B
7. Robert Andino, 3B
8. Nolan Reimold, LF
9. Ryan Adams, 2B

Starting pitcher: RH Alfredo Simon (3-6, 4.68 ERA)

TWINS (55-72)

1. Ben Revere, CF
2. Trevor Plouffe, SS
3. Joe Mauer, 1B
4. Justin Morneau, DH
5. Michael Cuddyer, RF
6. Jason Kubel, LF
7. Danny Valencia, 3B
8. Luke Hughes, 2B
9. Drew Butera, C

Starting pitcher: LH Brian Duensing (8-12, 4.75 ERA)

2011 Game 127: Mauers w/Pauers at P*ssy Single Hitters

Tonight, the Twins get to take on somebody their own size for a change. The O's are a sad 47-77, on pace for 101 losses per coolstandings.com.

Pitching matchup:
Zach Jeremy Britton for the O's (scheduled; he's coming off the 15-day DL, although it was for a strain in his non-pitching shoulder)
Carl Pavanostache for the Twins.

Bal'more is tied with Minnesota and Seattle for having used the most position players this season (35 different players have had PA), but they've gotten much better offensive production out of all that deck-chair shuffling (team OPS+ of 99, compared to 85 for the Twinkies).

On the bright side, the O's pitching staff leads the AL in HR allowed by a wide margin (157; Twins are tied for second at 130) and is last in the AL in "defensive efficiency" according to b-r (Twins are two rungs higher). So I'm rooting for a slugfest. How long has it been since Jimbo had a three-HR game??

(oh, and that Wieters guy? He's hitting 261/319/404 with 12 HRs and 69:32 K:BB in 426 PA, compared to Joe's 288/350/352, 1 HR and 33:23 in 277; so I suppose you could say that the moniker kind of fits this season)

Game 126: Yankees at Twins

The good news is the Twins have a chance today to avoid losing a series to the Yankees for the first time since Aug. 11-13, 2008.

The bad news is the Twins are sending Nick Blackburn to the hill, who is going through a bad stretch. He has given up at least four runs in four of his last five starts, although his one good start came against the Red Sox, the one team with a better offense than the Yankees. So, you never know.

Since the Delmon Young trade, the Twins are averaging 5 runs per game and that stretch includes facing Justin Verlander and C.C. Sabathia. Hopefully, they can do better than that against Ivan Nova. They'll most likely need it. GO TWINS!!