All posts by Twayn

Bats: Right Throws: Right

2013 Game 35: Pale Hosers at Twins

I used to love to hate the White Sox, but that fiery passion has cooled considerably in the past few years. Now I just like to dislike them. For this I blame Ozzie Guillen, who somehow against all odds and expectations brought a new level of civility and respect to the formerly fierce and nasty rivalry. I blame Ozzie because this is America, and we all know that in America the way a person feels about anything can never, ever, ever be blamed on the person doing the feeling; it must be either God's will or somebody else's fault. Ozzie's outspoken admiration for the Twins' brand of baseball during his Chicago tenure cowed the South Side trash talkers, and for that I don't think I can ever forgive him.

Continue reading 2013 Game 35: Pale Hosers at Twins

Game 28: Twins at Red Sox

Even casual fans, with proper coaching and education, are able to see that the Win is a flawed statistic for measuring pitcher performance. We can all take consolation in just how flawed the statistic is as the Twins begin a four-game series this evening at Fenway with Clay Buchholz taking the mound for Boston. Because Buchholz has notched six wins this year in his six starts and will be going for this seventh straight tonight. Earned Run Average is another pitching stat that's been maligned in recent years, though it certainly has more evaluative utility than the Win. So don't put too much stock in that 1.01 ERA that Buchholz will take to the mound with him, either. It's still early in the year, the sample size still small. And the fact that Buchholz is 3-0 with a 2.49 ERA against the Twins since 2010 shouldn't matter to you too much, either. Remember, numbers don't win games, players do. If you can repeat that mantra throughout the night about every ten minutes, in Joe Morgan's voice, you'll be just fine (or, ready for institutional commitment). There is still reason to hope for a Twins win tonight. Because just like warm weather in the spring, regression to the mean can come a lot later than you expect.

On the mound for the Twins tonight is Vance Worley, also tossing his seventh start of the year but with nary a Win to his credit and a 7.22 ERA to boot. But again, forget about the numbers. The beauty of this game is that anything can happen. Buchholz might get food poisoning or the gout. Somebody might shoot him in the arm with a tranquilizer dart during warmups. He could slip on a banana peel or some other less trite but equally slippery fruit rind and wrench his back. The point is that there's always hope. For Worley, who the Twins seem to be souring on a bit lately, the best hope is to keep the ball from flying out of the ballpark and to miss a heck of a lot more bats. Let's hope he can figure out how to do that tonight. And remember, hope is a good thing. It's just not a good basis for wagering.

Play ball!

2013 Game 12: LA Seraphim at Minnesota Gemini

Three weeks ago I was pretty much done with taxes, except for entering one form that my daughter needed to provide. After weeks of nagging, she finally sent it to me last Friday. I plugged it into the old 1040 today, and my refund got a happy ending. What's the lesson? Perseverance pays off. Maybe if the Twins persevere for the next five and a half months they could win the division. Probably not. But it's a good bet it will all come down to the pitching.

Today is Jackie Robinson day around the major leagues and you might see a number 42 here or there. I'll be going to see the movie on Sunday, so no spoilers, please.

Today the Angels send right-hander Joe Blanton to the hill, while the Twins offer Kevin Correia. Blanton in his last start gave up six runs in just over five innings, while Correia gave up three runs in eight innings and carried a shutout through the first seven. One move of note for the Twins, Oswaldo Arcia is called up before tonight's game to replace Wilkin Ramirez, who went on the three-day paternity list Sunday. I didn't even know there was such a thing.

Game 7: First Place Twins at Last Place Royals

httpv://youtu.be/vE0T-EA1294

For some reason Kansas City has received more than its fair share of musical tributes. Rodgers and Hammerstein gave the city the Broadway treatment with Everything’s Up to Date in Kansas City back in 1943. Over the years the town has been lauded in Leadbelly’s Kansas City Papa, Jelly Roll Morton’s Kansas City Stomp, Buck Owens’ The Kansas City Song, Count Basie’s Kansas City Shout, and Van Morrison’s The Eternal Kansas City, not to mention Kansas City Milkman, Kansas City King, Kansas City 90210, Kansas City Shuffle, Kansas City Funk, Kansas City Blues, Kansas City Man Blues, Train from Kansas City, 18th Avenue (Kansas City Nightmare), and Kansas City Southern by various artists.

Continue reading Game 7: First Place Twins at Last Place Royals

2013 Game 1: Defending AL Champs at Offending AL Basement Dwellers

First Pitch—3:10 p.m. Central
Probable Starters—Justin "Cy" Verlander vs. Vance "Can't Dance" Worley
Probable Outcome—Try not to think about it too much

“Awright, ladies!” Ron Gardenhire bellowed as he stuck his head inside the clubhouse door. “Stick your cups in your pants and hit the field, batting practice starts in five minutes!”

Inside, the entire Twins’ 25-man roster stood in a somber circle at the center of the room. Gardenhire walked over and nudged his way inside the group, only to see a battered old steamer trunk sitting on the floor.

“So it finally got here,” the manager muttered as he rubbed his whiskered chin. “About damn time, too.”

Continue reading 2013 Game 1: Defending AL Champs at Offending AL Basement Dwellers

WGOM Fitness: Oct. 19, 2012 – Cost Effective

Yesterday I completed the last of my Phase 2 Cardiac Rehab workouts. The nurse/trainers tell me I've done very well, and I feel like I have. In my final workout I did 20 minutes on the treadmill at 3.6 mph and 3.5 incline (any faster and I get into that funky gait somewhere between walking and running). Then I did 20 minutes on the elliptical machine at a resistance level of 5, averaging 115 watts and 8 METs over the 20 minutes. Continue reading WGOM Fitness: Oct. 19, 2012 – Cost Effective

WGOM Fitness: September 26, 2012 – Off The Horse

Stick is on the road and I am up to my ears in work, so I'm knocking this out over lunch. On the menu today is leftovers from last night's dinner. Mrs. Twayn continues to scour the series of tubes to come up with low-sodium and low-fat recipes that appeal to the tastebuds as much as they do to the waistline and coronary arteries. Continue reading WGOM Fitness: September 26, 2012 – Off The Horse

2012 Game 154: Evil Incarnate at Twins

First Pitch - 7:10 p.m. (set your digital watches)
Television - FSN

This late in the season, Time is not on our side. But with just over a week to go, we have a chance to at least play the Bandits and help our bretheren in Baltimore (including the Gentleman Masher) steal the American League East division title away from Evil. Of course, it won't be easy, but nothing is when your team has turned into a bunch of bumbling midgets that have stolen the map of all the holes in the Universe (like the one that sucked our starting rotation right into oblivion this season) and you're on the run from Bud Selig the Supreme Being.

On the hill tonight Liam Hendriks will face off against Andy Pettitte in a classic pairing of  rookie non-phenom versus veteran ace. In another time or place I might do a deep and thoughtful performance analysis of the two starters or the two lineups (probability level -99.7%), but honestly, today I feel  so mercifully free of the ravages of intelligence that I won't bother. Hell, gents, this thing only ends one way or the other. But it sure would be nice in the waning days of another lost season to have a hand in knocking the boys from the Bronx off their precarious one-game perch and forcing them into the playoffs as a wild card team instead of a division winner. And besides, you can never get enough of puppies this time of year.

Play ball!